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Wrath of the Titans

April 6, 2012

Hades: You’re sweating like a human, next it’ll be tears. 

Jonathan Liebesman’s Wrath of the Titans is arguably one of the most tasteless and claustrophobic experiences I’ve had in a theater. It is abundantly clear that Warner Brothers rushed the film’s production to make a quick paycheck based on the massive success Clash of the Titans was both domestically and overseas. Hell – the only exciting aspect of the film was that catchy song from the theatrical trailer. Alas, you never know how awful a film is until you witness it. What baffles me the most is that nobody learned their mistakes from the first film. In fact, they managed to develop a film worse than it’s predecessor. Wrath of the Titans is a cluttered mess that is dull and restrained. 

The script here is so profoundly flawed with a nonstop array of messy, uncoordinated, and useless dialogue. A grand example of how ridiculous Dan Mazeau and David Johnson’s script is stems from the unoriginality throughout. With the subject of mythology – there is a hell of a lot that could be done. But these writers chose to stick close to a generic and predictable plot throughout, which is not exciting to a person wholeheartedly against anything remotely unoriginal.

First of all – the tone of Wrath quickly fades into the uneven zone once the first [ridiculous] fight scene ensues. Second of all – who’s “brilliant” idea was it to repeat the EXACT SAME bad-guy formula as the first?! What is about to follow shows how clichéd the film is as well as how the formula is a near-replica of the first – spoilers ahead – a ridiculous opening fight scene is followed by a little introduction – this is then followed by a few minor villains that are clearly no match for our almighty hero – and we wrap things up with an unstoppable villain who is eventually defeated after a ridiculously long fight sequence – resulting in Liam Neeson doing something ridiculously ridiculous that saves the day. How ridiculous is that?

To my surprise, Liam Neeson doesn’t have the most mockingly silly performance in the film – it is Sam Worthington. Seriously – this dude hasn’t had a worthwhile role since his work on Avatar in 2009. I understood Clash of the Titans, and I garnered up the strength to forgive him for Terminator Salvation. At the rate Worthington’s going, he may turn into the Adam Sandler of awful action movies. Other Razzie™ worthy performances include Liam Neeson, Ralph Fiennes, and a few unknowns that I don’t even care enough to look up on IMDb. 

At this point, I’ve run out of words. Wrath of the Titans is H-O-R-R-I-B-L-E with a capital “whore.” The only joy I get out of the film is watching it fail severely domestically. 

Wrath of the Titans: 0.5 out of 5

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